Dealing with Life Transitions: Thoughts from an Adolescent & Young Adult Therapist

Dealing with Life Transitions: Thoughts from an Adolescent & Young Adult Therapist

It’s that time of year again. Summer is coming to a close, and so many young people and their families are preparing for the year ahead. As a therapist who specializes in working with Adolescents & Young Adults, Fall is a season of transitions both big and small for my clients. Whether it be the start of a new school year or even new school (transitioning to a new grade level, or leaving the nest to start their first year of college); or maybe it is the start of a new job, the beginning or ending of a relationship, or a big move. For young people, life transitions are inevitable. 

As humans, many of us really struggle with change and transition. We cling to our routines, the people and things that feel familiar and even safe. In fact, Research shows that even positive transitions can be stressful and create anxiety. Something I hear young clients say often, is how there is no manual to navigate these big life changes. Many young people feel alone in these anxieties, believing that they may be the only person feeling the way they do about this next step (aka the unknown) That is why it is so powerful to have open dialogue with your loved ones about the many emotions (excitement, fears, anxieties) that can be associated with change in life. These honest and raw conversations can be a stepping stone in preparing for the change that lies ahead. 

If I have learned anything as a therapist, it is that no two experiences are the same, and not every client is going to deal with the same situation in the same way. As humans, we are all different and may need different things. However, with that said there are also some universal ways that we can prepare ourselves and/or our children for the changes that lie ahead. 

Tips on Dealing with Transitions:

1. Set reasonable expectations: as mentioned… Change can be hard! Try to set the reasonable expectation that you will likely feel overwhelmed at times. It’s also helpful to remember that feeling stressed during transitions is completely normal!

2. Practice Self-Compassion: What types of things are you saying to yourself? What type of high expectations do you have for yourself (to the perfectionists out there, i’m talking to you)?  it is important to also be kind to yourself or your child during this time. Not sure how to do this? Ask yourself, “If my best friend was in this situation, what would I say to them to be supportive?” Then offer that same statement to your circumstance. 

3. Utilize Affirmations: the definition of affirmations is using ‘positive sentences that you repeat to yourself' to build up self-belief in the subconscious mind. This means effectively writing a list of affirmations that inspire and motivate you to be better and help to overcome inner barriers and self-doubt.
   Examples:
   I believe in me and in what I am capable of doing
   I am worthy of good things
   I am not alone
   Change is tough, but so am I
   I trust the process of life 
   I am worthy and so are my feelings, I have nothing to prove
   
   

4. Develop a Routine:  Consider creating morning and evening routines to facilitate a sense of consistency. Regular sleep and wake times, a daily walk or other form of mindful movement, and check-ins with loved ones can all be a helpful way to stay centered during this time. 

5. Let your Emotions Out: Okay, I hear you… facing our emotions isn’t always easy. But it is so important! If you’re sad, let yourself be sad. Scared? Trust me, you aren’t alone! Emotions are funny: the more we resist them, the larger they may become. 

Most importantly, if you or a loved one are experiencing a major life change, you don’t have to go through it alone. Counseling can be a great place to process our emotions and navigate change.

Paige Sparkman MA, LLPC, SCL specializes in working with Tweens, Teens and Young Adults experiencing Anxiety, Life Transitions, Stress Management, Depression, ADHD, and Disordered Eating. You can learn more about Paige at www.paigesparkman.com or contact her at hello@paigesparkman.com